Love Before It Is Lost

Loss is painful, be it the loss of a loved one, a friend moving away, or the breakup of a relationship.  There is a saying, "time heals all wounds."  This holds true for most physical wounds, but I feel it's not so for the pain of loss.  That pain is soul wrenching.  The wounds are invisible, but their intensity burns all the more for it.  I don't believe time can every truly heal these wounds.  That isn't to say time does not make them more bearable, however.  Time will never cover such an injury with the scars of healing, but can only provide us with the strength and courage to continue our lives. 

I know firsthand the beaten and broken state loss can leave someone in.  The strength to pick oneself up from such a blow seems at first, unobtainable.  Given time, this strength can be found with determination.  For some it may take longer than others, but no matter what, I believe all of us have it within ourselves to rise to such challenges. 

Loss is a powerful tool.  Many times words of advice, suggestions, and even warnings fall on deaf ears until the horrible jolt of losing something precious wakes us up.  It is one of the most difficult things in this world to accept, but sometimes the only thing significant enough to make us open our eyes and change for the better is that incredible loss.

I challenge everyone to take a minute to examine their own lives.  Look at the things you have; look at the people around you.  What aspects of y our life, if lost, would break you?  What kind of loss is capable of stopping you in your tracks and bringing you to your knees?

While I still believe experiencing loss is the only true teacher and the only thing that can really make people appreciate the things they have and the people in their lives, I do hope that we can all take a moment to acknowledge the beautiful things around us.  Call friends and tell them what they mean to you.  Thank parents, grandparents, teachers, and other role models for the guidance, care, and knowledge they have provided you.  Pet your dog or cat.  Hold your lover and love her or him like you never have before.

Confidence

Well, I got the job at Lowe's!  I actually went back in for another interview on Friday and they offered me the position.  I've been doing a lot of thinking as to why they picked me over all those other people.  I don't have extensive experience in that line of work, so I'm fairly certain that isn't the reason.  My education over-qualifies me for the position, which they actually commented on.  I was aware of this, but they were the only ones who I'd heard back from in weeks.  It's been my experience that companies are hesitant to hire individuals who are "over-qualified" for a job.  I think that's a ridiculous phrase by the way, "over-qualified".  If I was running a business, I would want the most qualified people available working for me.  Anyway, I kept trying to figure out what made them give me a second look and I am almost completely convinced it was simply my attitude and the energy I was projecting that day.

As you could probably tell from my post Thursday, I was in a very good mood.  I woke up in that mood.  In the past, on the day of an interview, I had been a nervous wreck, but that day I was perfectly calm.  I didn't walk in with the mentality of desperately needing the job.  If I got the job, great, but if not, I knew something else would eventually come along.  Don't misunderstand, I certainly answered the interview questions to the best of my ability, but I did it while projecting an energy of, "you need me, and if you don't see that, it is your loss".

I believe that this way of thinking is the key to success in all life situations.  Neediness is not attractive.  However, there is a careful line you have to walk between arrogance and confidence.  Nobody wants to be around someone who is arrogant, but a truly confident person will attract people like moths to a flame.

Smile

I had an interview at Lowe's today.  Sure, not the most glamorous job, but they are the ones who called me back, which is more than the truckload of other companies I have applied to has done.  I interviewed with two separate people, and then had to take a drug test.  I was then informed that I would find out about the job in one to three weeks.  Why such a long time?  Well, quite possibly because for the two open positions, they have 150 applications to sort through.  So I am up against at least 149 other people for this job.  This is the problem job seekers are facing everywhere right now.  My odds are not good.

You might think I would be having a bad day because of that, but in fact, I feel just the opposite.  Today is an amazing day and I feel great.  Why?  I feel great because I woke up this morning.  It is a great day because I got out of bed.  The entire world is waiting for me, and I am alive to experience it.  So maybe I won't get this job, but you know what?  That just means there is something even better for me waiting out there.  Heck, maybe my writing thing will start to pay off!

So what did I do on this rainy, yet perfect day?  After my interview I went running.  Since I am a new runner I have been training up by running for a set amount of time, then walking, then running again, and so on for about 30 minutes.  Not even two weeks ago my run/walk ratio was 60seconds/90seconds.  Today my ratio was 4minutes/2minutes.  In less than two weeks I quadrupled my run time and am running for twice as long as I walk.  Let me tell you, it feels damn good.

Everyone becomes conditioned to feel certain emotions, and those emotions soon become habit.  For a long time my habitual emotion was that of sadness, pessimism, and desperation.  I am retraining my emotions, so that my first response is not to focus on the negative, but to look on the bright side, to feel good, and to be happy.  I looked at myself in the mirror today and smiled.  Nobody else was anywhere around, nothing funny had happened, but I smiled, because I am me.  I dare you to find a better reason to be alive.

Look there, it's a post!

I'm running empty on ideas for today's blog, so I think I'm just going to start typing and see what kind of ramblings I can spew out.

"How are you?" is the first thing everyone asks when striking up a conversation with another person.  The look on someone's face when met with anything other than "fine, how are you?" is quite entertaining to me.  It's so funny to realize that the majority of people in this world could not care less about how you really are, but ask the question anyway because society has brainwashed them into thinking this is how all conversations should go.  The average person is probably on autopilot during the first few minutes of any conversation, as the questions and responses are always scripted.  It's no wonder miscommunication is so commonly a cause of stress in relationships and life in general.  We are so trained as to the polite way to hold a conversation, we don't even need to be mentally present.  Perhaps we should all try and muster up some genuine curiosity in the other person's well-being when having a discussion.

It drives me absolutely crazy when someone says "I could care less" when he really means "I couldn't care less".  Just stop and think about the words you are saying for a second.  "I could care less" means that there is indeed more room for less caring!  You are not yet at the absolute point of indifference.  Perhaps this is, in fact, the stance you are attempting to portray, but I doubt it.  I am fairly certain the phrase you seek is, "could NOT care less", meaning the subject in question holds no interest for you.

I would like to make sure everyone is aware of what the presence if an apostrophe (') signifies.  Look at words that have an apostrophe, such as "they're" or "it's".  That crazy little symbol hovering up there means that one or more letters are missing (with the exception of possessiveness, which should be Googled if you don't understand).  The apostrophe's job is to save that hole so that one day those letters will have a nice warm home to return to.  The apostrophe's job is thankless!  All day long it sits there, knowing that one day the letters may return and the apostrophe will be homeless and unemployed.  Show some respect for the poor little apostrophe.  Don't stuff it in places where it doesn't belong.  If you write "It's face is missing because of the acid," you have placed that poor apostrophe in a horrible situation.  It shows up to work on Monday and the letters around it begin shouting and demanding to know what it thinks it is doing there!  No letters are missing, you idiotic apostrophe!  You can't fit here!  Go back to where you came from!  You have just ruined the life of that poor little apostrophe.  If you've been paying attention, you will notice I employed several apostrophes in this paragraph.  Let me tell you, it feels good knowing I'm giving their lives some meaning.  Now let's say you slept through English, and you write, "Their coming over for dinner".  That's WRONG.  You don't mean "their", you mean "they're".  Now that poor apostrophe is shivering outside as he stares in at your warm little ignorant sentence.  Don't you feel bad?  Well you should!  Learn to write the language you speak!

Sawyer's Day

Wow, the peanut butter on this rubber bone is amazing.  It's on every corner!  This is the best thing ever!  I can't lick fast enough.  Oh, there is even some on the inside!  Getting that out will be a super fun game.

What a shame, all the peanut butter is gone now.  Wait a second, where are the humans?  They were right here just a second ago.  The tall one brought me this peanut butter bone.  I can't hear them or smell them.  This is not good.  I'd better whine to let them know I'm here.  Maybe they will realize they forgot me and come running. 

Well the whining hasn't worked.  I guess I should explore some.  This is a fairly big room.  There is plenty of space for me to move around.  There is probably more space where the humans are though.  Oh look, there are all my toys and my bed.  Those things could be entertaining but I'd better figure out where the humans are first.  I am sure they are having more fun than I could ever have here with all my toys.  Let's see, I seem to remember entering this room from over here.  There seems to be some sort of gate blocking my path now.  I'd better push on it to try and open it.  No good, it's not letting me through.  Well, I'm pretty sure the humans will be mad at me for this, but I really need to get out of here so I can see what exciting and amazing things they are doing.  Time to chew on the gate!  Yuck, this wood doesn't taste so good, but I'd better keep chewing anyway. 

I've gotten some very large chunks out of the bottom of the gate but I still can't get through.  I think it's time to chew on the upper part.  This isn't working much better.  I'd better claw at this carpet under the gate; perhaps I can tunnel through.  That's not working either!  I'd better lick the carpet under the gate so it gets good and wet.  Maybe that will allow me to escape!  Wait!  What the blazes is that next to me?  It's a chair!  I bet it tastes great!  I'd better chew that now.  I don't know why, but it seems like my best course of action.  Yummy, this is one heck of a tasty chair.  I wonder why nobody else has eaten it yet?

Those humans are still gone.  I really have to pee.  I'm going to hold it though, because I know I'm supposed to go outside.  What's that sound?  The door is opening!  The humans are home!  I'd better whine super loud so they can find me again!  The gate is opening.  Here comes the tall one!  Uh-oh, he looks upset.  I bet he wanted to eat that chair.  Oh gosh, I should have left it for him.  To make it up to him I'd better go ahead and pee all over the carpet so he won't have to take me out.  I know I've held it all day, but the best option is definitely to go now.  Wow, he looks angry!

Exercise!

I was thankfully blessed with a metabolism that allows me to eat almost anything without gaining a pound.  However, just because I'm thin doesn't mean I'm necessarily healthy or physically fit.  A little over a week ago I decided it was time for some life changes.  One of these changes, or goals rather, was to get myself in shape.  Now that I think about it, that is a very weird statement.  What shape?  Certainly not a circle. A trapezoid perhaps?  Maybe I'll aim to become a triangle.  Sorry, what was I saying?  Oh yes, it was exercise time!

The first thing I decided to do was start each day with some push-ups and sit-ups.  That was easy enough, but I needed to do something more.  I soon decided I would like to take up running.  There has always been a part of me that had some desire to be a runner.  In high school I ALMOST joined the cross country team, but I eventually decided I didn't want to put in the time and effort that would require.  Now, I am ready to give running its fair shot.  I have been out running every morning for over a week, with the exception of an extremely rainy day.  It was super hard to start with, of course, but I can already see a huge improvement in myself.  It feels great to accomplish something like this.  Every morning I push myself to the limit and am able to look back when I'm done, and feel proud.  I am bettering myself both physically and mentally, as I gain strength and the realization that I am capable of this.  Exercise is an amazing way to feel better about yourself, and I highly recommend that anyone physically able takes up running.

An area I know I have always been weak in is flexibility.  I have been doing stretches before and after running of course, but I wanted to take it a step further.  Today I started yoga.  Anyone who thinks yoga isn't a real workout has obviously never done it, or at least not done it properly.  Yoga involves placing your body in seemingly simple positions, and then holding it there.  After doing this for a while you would be surprised how hard it is to even keep your arms pointed straight up above your head.  I actually started the P90X version, YogaX, today.  Trust me, the workout was nothing to sneeze at.  To be honest, I know I should have probably started at a more basic level than P90X, but the intense workout was a pretty big rush.  I wasn't able to finish the entire video (over an hour and a half), but I hope to soon work myself up to that point. 

I have never really gotten enough exercise in my life, and now that I finally am, it feels great.  My appetite is better, I have more energy, and I feel good about myself.  I'm definitely sore, but it's a good kind of sore.  I can feel my aches and pains and be happy, knowing how hard I'm working to improve myself.

Book Recommendations Day 4: Miscellaneous

Today will be my final book recommendations post, and I thought I would suggest some books from several different authors instead of focusing on just one.  I'm going to try and list a wide variety of genres as well, so hopefully everyone can find something they might enjoy.  Let's get started!

If you've never heard of the late Douglas Adams, shame on you!  Adams is best known for his science fiction comedy series, kicking off with The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.  There has been a television show, a computer game, comic books, and even a movie based on this story.  I have seen both the television series and the movie, and am of course convinced that the book is still the best way to enjoy Hitchhiker's Guide.  The series follows Arthur Dent and his colorful companions on their adventures through the galaxy, following the destruction of Earth.  The link above is actually to an omnibus edition that includes the entire series (which I wish I owned), but you can also buy the books individually.  If you're looking for a good laugh, you can't go wrong with this one.

My next recommendation may seem daunting to some, shall we say, "inexperienced" readers.  Ayn Rand's The Fountainhead follows the story of an architect, Howard Roark, as he struggles to express his creativity during a time when originality and alterations from the norm are frowned upon and shunned.  The novel also contains elements from Rand's own philosophy, Objectivism.  This is not an easy read by any means, but the compelling story and philosophical elements could quite possibly give you a new outlook on life.  Next on my own personal reading list is Atlas Shrugged, considered to be Rand's crowning work.  I am looking forward to the read!

Battle Royale by Koushun Takami is quite a thrill ride.  If you are the squeamish type, you may want to just skip over this now.  Battle Royale is the story of a class of junior high school students that are ripped from their normal lives and sent to a deserted island where they are forced to kill each other until only one remains.  The novel  explores the varied reactions of the students as they come to the realization that there will be no escape if they don't play the game.

My final recommendation is The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger.  There is a movie, which admittedly captured the story fairly well, but if you have not yet seen it, please read the book first.  Henry DeTamble has a unique condition that causes him to involuntarily travel through time.  He cannot control whether he goes into the past or future any more than he can control when it happens.  The novel is actually a love story between Henry and Clare Abshire.  Clare first meets an adult version of time traveling Henry during her childhood.  This is the most touching story of love and commitment I have ever experienced and I'm not embarrassed to say, it brought me to tears.  Even if you don't normally go for love stories, you should check this one out.

I hope I've been able to provide some decent reading recommendations this week.  It's been pretty fun for me to talk about my favorite authors.  I think I may have another week in the future where I recommend some of my favorite comics, so if you're into that, keep an eye out for it!

Book Recommendations Day 3: Orson Scott Card

On Tuesday I told you my favorite author was Alastair Reynolds.  That being said, my favorite book, Ender's Game, is actually written by Orson Scott Card.  Card's bibliography is massive and covers several genres, but he is most well known for his science fiction work.  Card is an extremely decorated author, and is the only science fiction writer to win both the Hugo and Nebula awards for two years back to back.

Card has an extremely relatable style of writing.  He has an uncanny understanding of human emotion and thought processes, and can expertly convey this through his characters.  Card has a way of describing complex situations eloquently and intelligently, but also in a way that everyone can instantly grasp.  I have often said that reading Card's work just makes me feel smart.

Ender's Game tells the childhood story of prodigy, Andrew Wiggin (Ender), as he is chosen for battle school and trained to lead a military force against an alien species that threatens all of humanity.  If you haven't read Ender's Game before, you need to do so now.  I think I would be hard pressed to find someone who didn't enjoy at least part of this book.  Go read, I will wait.  

Now that you've read Ender's Game, you are no doubt desperate for more Ender.  You are in luck!  There are several sequels and even a spin-off series available.  Just recently, a direct sequel to Ender's Game was released, but I suggest you wait to pick it up.  If you fall as deeply in love with this universe as I did, you will want to read all the other books before this one.  The spin-off series follows Bean, a character from Ender's Game.  The first Bean novel actually takes place concurrently to Ender's Game.  After that, the Ender and Bean novels split off and each character has his own story.  So here is my suggestion on the order you read these books:

Ender Series 

Ender's Game 

Speaker for the Dead

Xenocide 

Children of the Mind

Bean Series

Ender's Shadow 

Shadow of the Hegemon

Shadow Puppets 

Shadow of the Giant

Ender's Game Direct Sequel

Ender in Exile 

You really can't go wrong with any of these books.  Be aware that the Ender series drastically changes after Ender's Game, but stick with it, it's worth it.

As I said, Card has written a LOT of books.  I'm sure you will be entertained by anything of his you pick up, but let me also recommend a couple other books outside the Ender universe that I particularly enjoyed.

Pastwatch follows the story of a group of future scientists who discover the technology to go back in time.  They make the decision to return to the time of Christopher Columbus to attempt to alter our past for the better.

In The Worthing Saga, people have discovered the means to continue living indefinitely.  The world eventually becomes completely corrupt and humanity almost destroys itself.  Ships are sent out to far away planets, carrying the means to start new civilizations.  Jason Worthing is in charage of one of these ships and The Worthing Saga is his story.

Gosh, reading back over all this I'm beginning to wonder if maybe Orson Scott Card really is my favorite author.  I guess it depends on the day!  Anyway, do yourself a favor and check out this amazing author if you haven't already.

Book Recommendations Day 2: Charlie Huston

Next up for my author week is Charlie Huston. Let me start off by saying, if you are faint of heart, Charlie Huston is definitely not the author for you; his stories are gritty and violent. If you can deal with that, then you will find Huston's books to be edge-of-your-seat thrilling and engrossing.

Huston has written two book series; the first is a trilogy of crime novels following the life of Hank Thompson, and the second is a five book story of a vampyre named Joe Pitt inhabiting New York City. He has also written a couple stand-alone novels. In addition to novels, Huston is also a comic book writer. Unfortunately, I have not read any of the comics he has worked on, but I have no doubt they are quite good.

If you are like me, you are sick of vampires. They seem to have been integrated into all forms of entertainment lately. Every time I turn around there is a new vampire movie or television show being released. Charlie Huston's vampyres are different; they are not the romanticized pretty boys filling the screens today. They are dark, ruthless, and not afraid to get their hands dirty. Even the protagonist, Joe Pitt, doesn't have clear redeeming qualities. The story follows Joe Pitt as he attempts to remain independent from the warring vampyre clans of the city. Even though he claims to be unaffiliated, the clans know that Joe is a tough, get-the-job-done kind of guy, and often torture, coerce, and otherwise strong-arm him into doing their bidding. The series starts off with Already Dead, and continues through No Dominion, Half the Blood of Brooklyn, Every Last Drop, and My Dead Body.  If you're looking for a dark gritty tale, you can't go wrong with these books.  Even if you aren't a fan of vampires, I think these books are worth the read.

Alright, maybe you just can't get over the vampire hurdle right now.  In that case, I would recommend checking out the Hank Thompson trilogy.  I do have a confession to make; I have not read the final book of the series.  I finished the second not too long ago and haven't had a chance to pick up the third.  After the first two books though, I have little trouble blindly recommending the entire set.  These are crime novels, and like the Joe Pitt series, they are very dark and gritty.  The story begins with Hank being in the wrong place at the wrong time.  He ends up with a bag full of money as he is chased around New York by Russian mobsters and crooked cops.  The series follows Hank as he tries to fix things, but just ends up getting deeper and deeper into trouble.  The trilogy consists of Caught Stealing, Six Bad Things, and A Dangerous Man.  If you questioned the vampire thing before, maybe these books will convince you to give the Joe Pitt story a shot.

Charlie Huston is a fantastic author who knows just how to grab his audience and make them hold on for dear life.  Once you start reading his books you just can't put them down.  If the subject matter is your kind of thing at all, I promise you'll be clawing at the pages to find out what happens next.

Book Recommendations Day 1: Alastair Reynolds

A few days ago a friend of mine asked for some reading recommendations.  I thought it might be fun to write some short articles here about a few of my favorite authors, both for him, and anyone else who might be looking for a good read.  I plan to discuss a new author every day for the remainder of the week. 

I decided to get things started with a bang and first recommend a man who is quite possibly my favorite author ever, Alastair Reynolds.  Reynolds is a science fiction writer.  He is a former astrophysicist with a PhD in astronomy, so as you might imagine, he knows his stuff.  The books he writes are epic space operas, with most spanning vast amounts of outer space over staggering amounts of time.

One of my favorite things about Reynolds' work is his ability to make the technology of his far-future stories seem so plausible.  He describes things, that to today's world, are impossible due to our current technological limitations, but nonetheless feel real and believable.  I attribute this to his background, having firsthand experience with current technology and being able to extrapolate on the progression we will make.  His knowledge also allows him to accurately describe space phenomena in thrilling ways.

So, what should you read first?  Reynolds does have a series of books based in the same universe.  The first of which is Revelation Space.  Other books from this universe are Chasm City, Redemption Ark, Absolution Gap, and The Prefect.  While a few characters do have recurring roles in some of the stories, and you wouldn't really want to read the books out of order, each of these books is still a fantastic read just by itself.  A whole series of books might still seem daunting to some, so I would recommend starting with the first Reynolds book I ever read, Pushing Ice.  It is a completely standalone story and a great first step into the world of Reynolds.  Another good standalone choice, and the most recent of his works that I have read, is House of Suns.  In my opinion you just can't go wrong by picking up anything he has written.

If science fiction isn't your thing, or if you enjoy it, but only on occasion, this author might not be for you.  Most of Reynolds' books are so heavily laden with science fiction elements that it might be intimidating to someone new to the genre.  I can still recommend one of his books to you, however!  Check out Century Rain.  It is still science fiction, but a majority of the story takes place in an ever so slightly altered version of 1959 earth.  This book would probably be a great place for people who have never read science fiction to start.  I feel like it will ease you into the genre, and with any luck, make you fall in love with Alastair Reynolds' work as I did.

AFK

I have obviously not posted in about a week.  I believe I am now ready to get back to normal posting, and I apologize for my absence.  Most of my readers are close friends and family anyway, so I felt like it might be appropriate to post a little about why I haven't been writing, even though it is somewhat personal.

I have been unhappy for quite some time.  I have posted a little about this before, but there are other reasons that I'm just not going to go into here.  A little over a week ago I reached my breaking point and fell into, what I believe was, the darkest moment of my life.  I reached a point where I did not want to go on.  The thought of having to make the hours of yet another day pass was unbearable.  I finally realized that I had to go somewhere with family and friends.  I gathered a few things, stuck the animals in the car, and went home.

I surrounded myself with friends and family all last week and I am happy to say I am in a much better place today.  I thank those people from the very bottom of my heart.  You may have seen me last week and still not know exactly what was wrong.  You may feel like you didn't do anything to help me.  That could not be further from the truth.  I was reminded that I was loved.  No matter how bad things get, I know there are people out there who care about me.  More than anything else, that was what I needed.

For a long time now I have not been happy with me.  I have known it on some level, but up until a few days ago I was blind to exactly how huge of an impact this was having on my life.  I came to the realization that I had to make changes.  I need to be able to look in the mirror and like the person I see.  Before I can hope to accomplish anything of value in this world, I need to love me.  I am working on a plan to make this happen.  I have a long way to go, but I have already begun taking steps in the right direction.  I came back down to my apartment in North Carolina today.  Some people wanted me to stay longer, knowing that I had been so broken only a week ago.  This is something I need to do though.  I have the reassurance I need from my family and friends and now I need to figure some things out by myself.  Please try not to worry, as I believe I am on the right track.

I want to say one last thing before I end this.  I realize that this is an extremely personal post and some may think it doesn't belong here for the world to see.  While you may be right to some degree, I do have my reasons for posting things like this.  I have always had an extremely difficult time expressing my emotions in spoken words.  I tend to keep everything bottled up inside and don't tell people what I'm going through because I don't want to appear weak.  After starting this blog I realized it could be a good outlet for my feelings.  There are people in my world that need to know what I'm going through, but maybe I don't have the courage to tell them face to face.  While I work on finding that courage, I am able to shine a little light on my life here.  I guess this is like a first step for me on my path to understanding myself and allowing others to know what I'm experiencing.

Remember Them With A Smile

I am well aware that what I'm about to talk about is a very touchy subject.  Some may instantly disagree with my words, but I hope everyone will at least take the time to read and think about what I have to say.  I think the United States needs to move on from the 9/11 terrorist attacks.  It was a horrible day in this country's history, to be sure, but continuing to linger on it, year after year, isn't helping anything.  Tomorrow will be the ninth anniversary of the attacks that took place in 2001.  By not moving on from this tragedy I believe we are giving the terrorists exactly what they want.

It's been nine years and memorials, protests, and other inane activities are still being planned.  First, let me make it clear that I am not lumping those who would attend the somber memorials in with the lunatics playing with matches.  I'm also not suggesting that we forget those who died.  I do, however, think we should attempt to move ahead and be that much more driven to succeed in our lives.  The memories of loved ones should not be tarnished by the atrocious acts committed by al-Qaeda.  I can only speak for myself of course, but I know if I had been a victim, I would wish for my family and friends to go out and do something to make them smile instead of mourning my loss every September 11^th.

The groups that attempt to use 9/11 to excuse their reprehensible activities make me sick.  If we resort to violence and protests we are no better than the terrorists.  The memories of 9/11, instead of fueling hatred, should be a sobering reminder that there is already enough violence in the world.  One definition of the word “human” according to dictionary.com is “sympathetic; humane”.  If we are ever to consider ourselves truly human, our first response to violence must not continue to be more violence.  The phrase “fighting for peace” should not exist.  While these human imposters are out there burning copies of the Qur’an and persecuting religions different from their own, real humans are helping others and working towards peace.

I understand the need for us as a nation to pay homage to those we have lost, but instead of tear-filled memorials, perhaps survivors could speak of the good things they have done since the attack.  One person might rise and tell of how he has become the head of his very own successful company.  Another might speak about the volunteer work she has done for the sick or homeless.  Still another person might simply need to say that he has gotten out of bed every morning, planted a garden, or walked his dog.  These things show that the terrorists have not won.  September 11^th was a tragedy, but we can move on.  No act of cowardly violence can stop us from continuing to live and thrive.  I ask that tomorrow the tears be wiped away by smiles and we sing joyfully the fact that we are still here and we are strong.

Alone I Break

What can you do,

When love leaves you cold,

When your heart empties out,

Left with no one to hold?

The hurt and the pain,

Push out everything else.

You think back on your life,

And start hating yourself.

Without her there,

The world is dark.

The loneliness,

Will tear you apart.

Your soul always aches.

The pain just won’t stop.

You find yourself wishing,

You’d never wake up.

She’s what made you whole.

How can you go on?

Your life has no meaning,

Now that she’s gone.

You beg and you plead,

For any reprieve.

What could you have done,

To make her not leave?

At the end of the day,

You close your eyes,

And picture her face,

One more time.

The flame of your love,

Is the only light left.

It burns alone,

Within yourself.

Deep Bellied Cats and Dental Wizardry

I'm pretty tired today because I didn't sleep so well last night.  I'm visiting my parents this week and I brought my pets with me.  That means, when it is time for sleeping, I share my old bedroom with two cats and a dog that is big enough for a child to ride.  Surprisingly, Sawyer (the dog), is the quietest of the three.  He flops himself down in a corner and is asleep fairly quickly.  Kat (aka Justice), the smallest of my cats is also fairly quiet.  Now Tucker, on the other hand, is quite large and quite loud.  When I come into the room he seems to feel the need to show me just how much he is capable of eating.  While his eating accomplishments are indeed quite impressive, the middle of the night is just not the time to showcase them.  After about the third trip to the food bowl in only twice as many minutes last night, I decided he would not starve before morning and moved the food bowl out of his reach.  Tucker was unfazed by this and moved on to a new activity: attempting to set a record for the most ruckus caused while in a litter box.  So I put up with his banging and digging for several minutes until he finally finished his business.  I thought that maybe then I could finally get some quiet.  I got settled down in bed, closed my eyes, and then what felt like at least 17 cats ran across me.  Tucker had decided that my bed was the quickest route to travel from one window to the other, and apparently he was following something outside because he kept the path hot.  By this time, all the commotion had caused it to become quite warm in my room.  I finally gave up and Sawyer and I moved to the couch in the den to let Tucker have his wild party in the bedroom.

This afternoon I had the pleasure of going to the dentist.  It was just a routine checkup, but I certainly wouldn't call it fun.  Nothing particularly bad happened, I just hate the dentist.  I admit that I used to hardly ever floss, so a trip to the dentist meant bloody gums and flossing lectures.  In recent years I have changed my ways.  I have become diligent in my flossing endeavors, and floss almost every day.  The dentist refuses to believe this.  He looks down upon me with doubting judgmental eyes, even though the positive effects of my flossing shine bright and clear.  It's like he suspects me of using some form of dark magic to remove debris from between my teeth.  "Are you flossing?" he asks.  "Almost every day!" I reply.  "Hmmmm," he responds, jealous of my mystical arcane abilities.  Anyway, I made it through another checkup, and thankfully no problems were found.

Hatred Burns Hotter Than Any Flame

You may have seen this in the news lately.  A Florida pastor, Terry Jones, and his congregation are planning to burn Qur'ans to protest the September 11, 2001 attack, and also because they are uninformed simpletons.  The U.S. Embassy had to issue a statement separating the rest of the country from this heinous act.  The congregation has even been warned that their actions could endanger troops stationed in Afghanistan because of the retaliations this could cause.  Even after being shunned by the rest of their country they are still willing to go through with their plan.

I fail to see the fascination religious fanatics have with burning things.  If there is anything they perceive to be the slightest bit contrary to their interpretation of the Bible, or if there is something they simply do not understand, the only option seems to be to burn it.  These people have no idea what the Qur'an contains.  The majority of the congregation probably didn't even know it was the religious text of Islam until their attention starved pastor told them it needed destroying.  Jones even admits to having not read the Qur'an.  If I was head of a congregation and felt it was my duty to spread my views to the world, I think I would certainly want to read everything I could to know what I was up against.

The thing that really makes me mad is that this United States of America is supposed to be a harbor for religious tolerance and acceptance, no matter how you choose to worship.  Yet we still have imbeciles like this who abuse the freedoms provided by this country to peddle their hate and slander and attempt to deny others the right to worship as they see fit.  Jones has the gall to say that the burning of the Qu'ran is "not a message of hate".  How is the burning of something that millions of people hold dear and sacred anything but a message of hate?  He says it is only targeted toward the "radical element of Islam".  How can he justify that?  If a Bible was burned, would the whole of Christianity not be enraged?  In addition, Jones has no right to place Christianity on such a high pedestal, and pass judgment on what sects of a religion have a right to exist.  The Ku Klux Klan practiced Christianity after all.

Terry Jones interprets the Bible as he sees fit.  Sadly there are many people out there who are quick to manipulate their own religions to help validate their actions.  Perhaps Jones should spend a little more time studying his own religious book.  The Bible does say the world will be destroyed by fire after all.  Perhaps this is the first step.

Buying My Way To Perfection

What's with all my physically fit posts lately?  Who knows!  Anyway...

I am convinced that people will buy anything.  If enough advertisements bombard us with how amazing some new product is, we can't help but run out and purchase it.  No matter what time of day you turn on the television you are bound to see at least one commercial advertising a spectacular new exercise tool, guaranteed to give you the body of your dreams in a few short weeks.  These commercials catch the eyes of people as they think that maybe they too can obtain the chiseled bodies shown on the screen.  Commercials wouldn't lie to us after all, right?

Apparently commercials would indeed lie to us.  You have no doubt heard about exercise shoes, the latest trend in staying physically fit.  These shoes are designed with specially padded soles to tone your lower body as you walk.  "Why, that's amazing!" you might say.  "I could strengthen my legs while walking, and I walk every day!  Wait, didn't walking already do that anyway?"  The shoe companies would then answer, "Quiet you naysayers, these shoes are special.  Traditional walking won't get you the shapely figures portrayed by these television models."  Well, studies have shown otherwise.  I came across this article today.  A study performed at the University of Wisconsin showed the benefits of these fancy exercise shoes to be the same as those from regular sneakers.  Many people have said they feel sore after wearing the exercise shoes, so it must be doing something, right?  The study goes on to explain that any soreness felt is simply from the different padding provided by these shoes and it will go away once your body becomes accustomed to it.

Along with exercise shoes, many other breakthroughs in exercise technology fight for our monetary attentions.  These crazy creations allow us to wheel, gallop, ski, and who knows what our way to physical perfection.  One such product that I find endlessly entertaining is the Shake Weight.  I don't think I even have to comment on this one.  Go check out the website.  The ridiculousness of this device speaks for itself. 

The fact that all these 'exercise tools' are purchasable blows my mind.  I picture households littered with discarded contraptions that were supposed to be the keys to a movie star body.  I also picture crushed dreams and people sitting on couches drowning their sadness with another bag of potato chips.

Can't Fit Through the Kitchen Door

Americans are fat. This is a problem that is getting no way but worse. Go to the store and I guarantee you will see at least five people who are unhealthily large. I'm not talking about the people with a little extra weight around the edges here, but the full blown elephants. You've seen them. They have seven chins, their bellies sag so low they could act as pants, and they have knees on the back of their calves. We, as a country, continue to gain more and more weight, and something should be done about it.

It saddens me to go out to eat and see overweight people stuffing their faces. A short while ago I was dining at Pizza Hut and a lady was sitting close by who easily weighed 500lbs. She was alone, but certainly didn't need any help polishing off her meal. No carryout box was required when she was ready to leave. I'm certainly not saying people shouldn't be allowed to eat what they want, but if you look like that, is going into public and scarfing down an entire pizza really the best thing to do? It shows the world that you've given up. Maybe that woman would say she was happy with herself, but even so, her life expectancy has to be drastically reduced by all that extra weight.

I was fortunate enough to be able to take a trip to China a couple years ago. I do not remember seeing a single overweight person during my entire two weeks there. The Chinese just generally eat healthier. Their lives don't revolve around junk food and quick meals. Not to mention, they walk and bicycle a LOT. Even in the smaller cities I visited, people could be seen outside walking or riding their bikes to their destinations. The majority of people in this country wouldn't even consider walking to the store, even if it was right down the street. You might argue that people walk all the time in larger cities like New York, but just look at the streets. The streets are flooded with bumper to bumper traffic almost 24 hours a day. There may be those who walk, but there are just as many, if not more, out there in cars and taxis.

Bicycle parking lot in China

Even the army is feeling the burdens of overweight America. I ran across this article today. New recruits are entering the army increasingly overweight. The army is in the process of completely altering its training program, eliminating sit-ups and running so that these physically unfit recruits can survive. Granted, from what they say in the article, it sounds as though the training program was ready for a few changes, but should overweight and unhealthy recruits really be the driving force behind such change?

Some people may think it is easy for me to sit here and preach in my buck fifty body and metabolism that wouldn't let me gain weight if I tried, and you are certainly right. Believe me when I say I feel for those working hard to drop a few pounds. I've never had to lose weight, but I have no doubt it is a daunting task. Instead of working so hard to promote weight loss programs and diet pills, maybe this country should focus more on fighting obesity before it happens. Parents today are quick to toss their child a hamburger from the fast food restaurant on the way home from work because it is quick and easy. Instead, they should be taking the time to prepare something for their children that is actually healthy and contains the nutrients for proper growth. With every generation becoming more and more overweight, if nothing changes, you have to wonder what we'll be like a few years down the road. In my head I picture a nation of Rascal Scooter riding lard buckets who no longer wear clothing because it takes too much effort to dress. Let's try and avoid that shall we?

Here's My Sign, Here's My Slogan, Ignore Me Now, Cuz I'm a Moron

Human beings are filled with rage. It amazes me how people are not content to keep their anger to themselves, but must enter into the world with signs and slogans to spread their hatred with the masses. Not a day goes by that you don’t find news of a picketing group somewhere. Is it really necessary to make such fools of yourselves, simply because something displeases you? Well you know what? You people make me angry and I feel like posting about it. Call me a hypocrite if you like, but at least when I express my feelings here, people have the opportunity to leave my blog if they don’t agree with what I say. When you stand in the streets, blocking paths and shouting at passersby, people have little way of avoiding you.

One of the things I find most irritating is when people use religion in an attempt to validate their malice toward a particular subject. In reality, all you are doing is using religion as a shield to hide your ignorance. A good example of this is the religious outcry heard in response to the release of the Harry Potter books and movies. Uneducated morons picketed and even got these books banned in some places because they are about witches and wizards. Really? Is this the 16th century? Had any of these people actually read the books? Of course not! The Harry Potter series, at its core, is a story of good triumphing over evil. Is that really what these religious zealots should be fighting to stop? For the first time in generations, America’s youth could be seen out in the world with books in their hands. Harry Potter introduced kids to the joys of reading, yet religious bigots wanted these fantastical tales off their shelves.

Picketer tactics are to pester and annoy until someone gives in to them, or forcefully drives them off. Is this really the best means to an end? Obnoxious complaints don’t get real results. You haven’t changed any minds. Instead, people give in to your outrageous demands just to make you go away. Picketers are like flies, nothing more than common pests. Money is thrown at them or decisions are made simply to swat them away.

There is enough anger and sadness in the world without everyone running to the streets with their signs when they disagree with something. In the long run these people have accomplished nothing. Maybe they’ll get what they want for now, but no opinions have been changed. How much harm has been done during these idiotic crusades for an empty victory?

The Day of Expiration

Chuck was driving home from work one day when a giant refrigerator parachuted out of the sky and landed on the road in front of him. Chuck slammed on his brakes, but couldn’t stop in time. His car collided with the giant fridge.

The fridge let out an unearthly roar. “Nooooo! My door will no longer shut properly! I must use extra energy to preserve my insides!!” The refrigerator began to hum as his motor cooled that which dwelled within the great white behemoth.

Chuck was unharmed and quickly exited his car. He ran towards a nearby payphone to call the police. To his dismay a sign hung from the payphone which read: ‘I am out of order. Do you really not have a cell phone anyway?’ Alas, Chuck did indeed lack a cell phone.

“Oh no, what can be done?” wailed Chuck. “We are being invaded by a disgruntled refrigerator and there is no one who can help me!”

“Fear not!” came a cry from a nearby bush. Out jumped a blue raccoon toting the largest flamethrower Chuck had ever seen. “I am here to unleash fiery fury!” he screamed. He bounded off towards the giant fridge, flamethrower in tow.

“Be gone blue beast!” boomed the fridge. “I am here to conquer all!”

“Fat chance!” screamed the raccoon. He lit up his flamethrower and began torching the base of the refrigerator.

“Let them eat toast!!” screamed the fridge.

Suddenly toasters began raining from the sky. Their metallic bodies pelted the sidewalk and dented up things quite horribly. The raccoon was forced to retreat under a nearby tree.

Chuck ran to join the raccoon under the tree. “I should have known! Why, just this morning I passed a man with a sign reading, ‘The frigidation is nigh!’ I thought him simply another lunatic!”

The raccoon laughed maniacally. “Oh Chuck, I am but a raccoon. I know not of such things!” The blue raccoon ran off into the bushes from whence he had come, shooting fire into the sky and spouting nonsense.

Chuck realized there was nothing to be done. He sat down under the tree, prepared to meet his chilly fate.

That night, the streets became stained with condiments.

Words

Crafted with love or fear or loathing.

Fueled by hope and hate and brooding.

They create our wars and start our fights,

Mend our hearts and change our lives.

They bring some comfort to those with none,

But give the orders to fire the guns.

With edges sharp they’ll cut you deep.

May keep you from or give you sleep.

They touch our souls and bring us peace.

Make soldiers cry and children dream.

They fill our books, they give us language.

They cause the rise and fall of nations.

They form the world and keep us safe,

By protecting ideals and preserving faiths.

Their sting burns longer than any weapon.

Their resounding consequences forever echo.

Alone they survive the test of time,

Preserving our past for all humankind.

Man's Best Friend

Growing up I was always a cat person. As a child, I always wanted a dog. Hours were spent daydreaming about our joint adventures exploring the world, the dog heeding my every command. I was never able to have a dog though. We always had at least one cat in the house and I was told they would not get along. In hindsight, this was probably for the best. Dogs take a lot more care than cats, and I doubt, at that age, I would have been able to give a dog the time and attention it required, no matter how much I tried to convince my parents otherwise. I am still a cat person of course, but also have quite a soft spot in my heart for friends of the canine variety.

I maintained my desire for a dog into adulthood. Last winter I finally got a dog of my own. My chocolate Labrador, Sawyer, is sitting in the floor next to me as I write this. Let me tell you, he was worth the wait. He is everything I always dreamed a dog to be. Sure, he occasionally chooses to ignore my commands, but for the most part, he is a very good, obedient dog. Below you will find a picture of Sawyer and Tucker sharing a tennis ball.



Sawyer is a great friend. If I'm feeling down he can run into the room with his big goofy grin and I can't help but smile. He gives me a reason to get up and out. I doubt I would get nearly as much exercise if it weren't for Sawyer. We go on daily walks at the nearby Battleground Park. Obviously it's healthy for the both of us, but it's also fun to get out in the world, see some people, and make my dog extremely happy. Sawyer proudly walks next to me waving his tail. He always knows when someone is complimenting him, and let me tell you, he definitely gets the compliments. He has had countless people tell him how handsome/cute/great he is on our walks.

Seeing my dog happy definitely makes me happy. I simply say the word "treat" and he looks at me with such excitement and joy that my troubles have no choice but to take a backseat for a while.

Sawyer loves to play. He always seems to know when I come home from the pet store with a new toy for him. He sits and waits while I take his gift from the bag and remove the packaging. Upon receiving his new treasure, Sawyer proudly lifts it high in the air with his mouth and parades it around the apartment to make sure everyone (cats included!) has had a good look. If I need a break from the world, Sawyer is always more than happy to bring over one of his toys for a quick game.

Owning a dog is a great experience. There is a lot of time and work involved, but to me, it is more than worth it. Sawyer is a wonderful dog and a great friend. I just hope the cats don't get jealous!

Fire and Courage

His sword glistened in the morning sunlight. He inspected his shield, blackened and scorched. He tried to block out the carnage strewn about him. The night had taken its toll with little to show in return. His comrades fallen, he alone remained to face the dragon.

A plume of fire spit into the air beyond the hill the knight hid behind; the morning’s glow seemed dim in comparison. Gathering his courage, the knight pulled the visor of his helm back down over his eyes. He tightened his grip on shield and sword as he charged the top of the hill, a battle cry roaring from his smoke filled throat. The great black dragon turned to face the sound, its massive claws cutting deep furrows into the earth. A thunderous roar shook the ground and smoke billowed from the dragon’s flared nostrils. Its gaping maw let loose a pillar of fire, scorching earth and air as it flew toward the knight. The knight crouched down behind his shield. Fire curled around its edges as the mighty blast hit. The intense heat soaked through the shield like water on a shirt. The carefully forged metal began to melt around the knight’s gauntleted hand. Just as the knight thought he could stand no more, the dragon’s fiery assault broke off. The knight pried his now useless shield from his arm and tossed the melted remains to the ground.

The dragon lifted its head high into the air as if preparing to unleash another molten breath. Instead, its massive wings unfurled from its back and began to beat, clearing the area of morning fog and battle smoke. The unrelenting blasts of air brought the knight to his knees. The dragon lifted from the ground, its wings blocking out the sun itself. The dragon flew towards the knight, pulling up at the last second to bring its lethal tail sweeping down onto him. The knight attempted to dodge, but was not quick enough. The scaled tail caught his torso and hurled him across the charred field. The breath left his lungs as the knight hit the ground. His head bounced, sending his helm flying. Above he could see the onyx beast circling around for another pass. The knight struggled to his feet, desperately trying to get his breath. He spotted a nearby rock and stumbled toward its cover. He felt the dragon breath burning around him as he ducked behind the rock, barely a moment before the fiery attack struck the ground. He glanced down at his battered armor. The tail attack had left it bent and broken. His movement would be too hampered if he left it on. The broken joints allowed the armor to slip off easily. The knight secured his sword into a sheath on his back and stepped out from the rock, prepared for his final stand.

The dragon belched a ball of fire up into the clouds and began another deathly swoop towards the knight. The knight set his feet and stood his ground. There was no turning back now. He was all that stood between this destructive beast and the town in the valley below. The dragon picked up speed as it made its descent. It began to bring its tail around for another swipe. The knight was ready. As the tail swept across the ground the knight leapt into the air. He reached out and grabbed hold as the tail crashed down where he had stood. The dragon flew into the sky, the knight using every ounce of strength to hold on. Slowly the knight began crawling up the dragon’s body, using its massive black scales as hand and footholds. Meanwhile the dragon dove and spun in the air, trying to dislodge its attacker. The knight continued his journey; hand over hand he made it to the dragon’s shoulders. He reached underneath and got a firm grip on a scale at the front of the dragon’s neck. The knight let the rest of his body fall, leaving him dangling high in the air between the dragon’s front legs. With his free hand, the knight pulled his sword from its sheath. He swung his body towards the dragon’s chest, his sword’s razor edge gleaming as the knight plunged it between the dragon’s scales, into its heart. A deafening scream pierced the air as the dragon cried out in anger and pain. Its wings stopped their motion and the dragon began plummeting to the ground far below. The knight held on, twisting his sword into the dragon as they fell. A cloud of dirt exploded into the air when the dragon finally hit the ground.

The knight gazed across the battlefield to the fallen beast as it took its final, dying breath. The knight smiled, oblivious to his own battered and broken body. The dragon had fallen; he had saved the town. The knight closed his eyes and allowed the darkness to take him.

Local Boy Writes Blog, World Astonished

I will be the first to admit that I don’t follow news and current world events as closely as I should. The main reason behind this is not that I don’t care, but that I have absolutely no faith in the media. Certainly there are important stories out there that I should be aware of, but to get to them I have to wade through an ocean of garbage and senseless prattle.

For fun I am going to explore CNN's website while I write this and comment on some of the stories I find. Under the “latest news” section there are of course several very worthwhile stories that the world should probably check out. However, mixed in with these real news stories are topics such as, “Lady Gaga dresses as a man?” and “Lindsay Lohan spotted post-rehab”. Is this seriously the kind of news CNN should be making known to the public? Do Americans really have nothing better to do than follow the bumbling mistakes and cries for attention of movie stars and music artists? If this is the reason you read the news, let me give you a preview of tomorrow: Some star is going to screw up! Do you know why? It’s because he/she is human like the rest of us. People make mistakes. Stars don’t make any more or less than the rest of the world, but because everyone knows who they are, they make the news. It may be fun to sit back and laugh at the mishaps of those in the limelight, but how many of their mistakes have also been made by you or someone you know? Do you need news of failures of people who don’t matter in the long run to make your day complete? Maybe you should just go look in the mirror.

Moving on, also on CNN’s website I see the article, “Intriguing: Ex-Bush official is gay”. Are you kidding me? There is so much wrong with that I don’t even know where to begin. First off, why is that intriguing? I would be intrigued if an ex-Bush official was a watermelon! Maybe not surprised, but intrigued to be sure. Every time I see a news report about someone being gay I lose a little more of the minuscule amount of respect I have for humanity as a whole. It is 2010. Is it not time to leave our bigotry behind? A friend of mine, Travis Anders, brought to light a very good point in an article he wrote a while back, there should be no gay rights, but only human rights. We are human beings no matter our race, religion, or sexual preference. This kind of smut should be out of the news by now. Yes, I call it smut, because to me it is obscene to continue making stories out of the fact that someone is gay. Even if the story is pro-gay, humanity should be above the need to continuously drag it to light. We don’t see stories about the ex-Bush official who just happened to be heterosexual after all.

Finally I want to comment on a news story related to the recent stabbing of a Muslim cab driver in New York City. I won’t go into the stabbing itself, the horror of which should be quite obvious. The title of the article I do want to talk about is, “Acquaintances ‘shocked’ at film student’s arrest in Muslim stabbing”. I see this type of thing in the news quite often. Everyone is always so surprised when someone commits an act of violence. Well, I would certainly hope they would be surprised! The day I start seeing news articles entitled, “Acquaintances say they saw it coming” will be a very sad day indeed. If these people had known their friend, family member, or neighbor was on the verge of inflicting harm on another person I certainly hope they would tell someone about it. I guess it’s a good sign that people still have a positive enough outlook on the world to think their friends incapable of evil, but does it really need to be a news story?

The preceding was simply my opinion. Everyone is free to agree or disagree as they see fit. I think it’s time for me to do something else, as the morning’s journey through the world’s news has left me feeling a little down. Maybe I’ll go watch some cartoons.

New York Comic-Con

I have been able to attend New York Comic-Con (NYCC) for the past two years. This has undoubtedly been one of the most fun experiences of my life. A massive convention center dedicated to things that make me happy? What’s not to love? Comic-Con takes all my passions and hobbies and throws them together in one convention center. There are panels and booths on comics, books, movies, and video games. Who would need anything else?

I’ve never been one for crowds, but somehow it doesn’t seem to matter at NYCC. Believe me, the place is crawling with people, but I barely even notice. I’m too engrossed in checking out the vendor and exhibit booths. The crowds are by no means threatening anyway. NYCC is a place where like-minded people can get together to enjoy the things they love. Some even dress up as their favorite movie, comic, or video game character. This is called cosplay and some truly amazing costumes are sure to be seen. On the other hand, there are a few people whose costumes leave you wondering if they just lack any self-respect, or simply don’t own a mirror at home. Either way, they do at least provide entertainment.

New York Comic-Con is quite a big deal, and the panels are equally big. Panel goers can expect to hear news of new comics, movies, and video games in the works, including many NYCC exclusive details. No matter what your interest, Comic-con will have a panel for you. If I am able to attend this year I hope to check out some of their writing panels. Of course I will also want to see several panels with interviews of my favorite writers and creators. It’s so very exciting to see, in person, these people who have created these amazing things that I love and treasure. Last year I passed Orson Scott Card on the show floor. I had a huge fanboy moment and couldn’t think of anything to say to him. Many people get star struck by movie stars (plenty of which will be at Comic-Con) but for me, my real heroes are the writers and creators of the books and comics that I love.

While not attending a panel or simply watching the crowd, I spend my time wandering through the show floor. The sea of booths contains vendors, comic companies, artists, writers, podcasters, and so much more. Comic-Con lasts for three days, but even after that time, I still am still left feeling like I haven’t seen it all. One of my favorite stops is “Artist’s Alley”, where comic artists have setup shop and will do drawings for fans. I don’t usually buy anything here, but it is still really entertaining to see these artists drawing my favorite characters in person.

I no longer live in New York, so the NYCC experience will not be as easy to obtain this year. It is in October so I’ve still got almost two months to sort something out. With any luck I’ll be there rubbing elbows with fellow fans and stars alike!

~A Princess Tale~

Once upon a time there was a princess named Aria who lived in a tree because she was afraid of castles. What kind of princess is afraid of castles you might ask? To you I would say, do not interrupt the story! For many moons she was trapped atop this ancient tree, for her fear of splinters kept her from climbing down. Again you might feel the need to interrupt and ask how she got to the top of the tree in the first place. For this question I will give you an answer: MAGIC!

Now where was I? Oh yes, many moons, atop a tree, so lonely! Well, she did have servants who climbed the tree every day to bring her tea and sandwiches, so she wasn’t really alone. To be honest she got to see many people as the tree was located next to the castle entrance and everyone traveling to and from the castle had to pass by it. They would shout jolly hellos to her and sometimes laugh because what kind of crazy princess is afraid of castles anyway?

The king and queen of the castle begged their daughter to see sense and come down from the tree, but she swore never to descend unless a young prince proved his love to her by slaying the dragon in the nearby town. Many princes would come by and gaze up at her (she was actually quite attractive).

“Why doth thou live atop yon tree?” the princes would ask.

“I await my true love,” she would answer. “And also I have a strange fear of castles!”

Many princes would shout, “thou art crazed!” and leave her to her tree at this point, but some became enamored by her beauty and would say, “Cometh down from yon tree, for thou true love be me!”

“Why do you talk so funny?” the princess would ask.

“I’m really not sure,” they would answer. “But what can I do to win your love?”

“Slay the dragon and bring me his head!” she would tell them.

The princes would go home at this point because the dragon’s teeth and claws were oh so sharp. Also, he had very hot breath that smelled much like rotting meat. Finally, he was actually a pretty nice guy and they would just feel bad about killing him.

The princess feared she would never find true love. Then one morning she awoke and found herself lying upon the ground!

“How did I get here?” she asked no one in particular.

No one in particular remained silent and she never learned how she got to the ground. But fear not, I will tell you! The family of squirrels who also inhabited her tree removed her in the night, for her smell was quite ferocious! Baths are not readily available at the tops of trees after all!

Alas this tale has now reached its conclusion. What’s that? What about the princess and her lack of true love? Well come on now, who would really want to spend the rest of their lives with someone who was afraid of castles and splinters?

Happy Birthday Dad!

Today is my dad's birthday. I thought this would be a good time to write a little about him. I wrote about my grandfather a few days ago, and my dad is definitely his father's son. Dad never lacks for something to say and he can have a conversation with anyone, just like Grandaddy could. Stick him in a room full of strangers and in a few minutes he will have made a room full of friends.

Dad used to work for Nationwide Insurance and spent a lot of time out on the road. I remember getting the chance to go with him on some of his day trips. I was fairly young, so I don't remember all the details of any trip in particular, but several moments do shine through. I know I had to have been bored to tears while Dad took care of the actual business parts of these trips, but it must not have been too bad since I don't remember it. Instead, I remember the fun times.

We would have to stop for lunch of course, and I remember eating with Dad at Macado's. This was and remains one of my favorite places to eat. I loved potato chips, so anywhere that served a mountain of them with your meal was ok in my book! Dad couldn't have made a better choice for us. I felt proud eating with my dad, who was all dressed up for work. I had no doubt that we were the most important people in the place.

I also remember stopping at a knife store. The insides of which held every kind of pocketknife known to man. We weren't into hunting or anything like that, but what little boy doesn't want to wander through isles of knives with his father, dreaming about the amazing figurines he could carve out of sticks in the backyard. Here were Dad and I, exploring this very manly store together. I couldn't have been happier.

More than anything else I remember just being happy on those trips with my dad. Even if he did have to work a little, those days with just the two of us traveling the road are treasured memories. No doubt he made us some new friends from shopkeepers and restaurant staff along the way too. Thanks for letting me tag along Dad. You don't know how much it meant to me. I hope you have a happy happy birthday!

Waiting Love

I see you look into my eyes,
Though your gaze is far away.
You wish that I was something more,
I know you cannot stay.

I try to be the things you need,
My love, forever true.
Your dreams are dancing elsewhere,
I hear them call to you.

I would not stop your changes,
You cannot live for me.
I hope you find your happiness,
Wherever it may be.

I ask that you remember,
The times and trials we’ve seen.
The happiness we’ve been through,
More perfect than a dream.

This will not be our story’s end,
Our love is much too great.
You’ll face the world and find yourself,
In the meantime I must wait.

My love, seek out your missing piece,
I give my strength to you.
Have faith, for I will have your back,
In all you ever do.

The Path I've Chosen

"Just get any job for now. You don't have to do it for the rest of your life." These are statements I have been hearing a lot lately. Would someone please tell me where to find "any" job? It's not like I sit at home and wait for a job to come knocking on my door. I have spent countless hours preparing resumes and cover letters, sending them out, and being deafened by the silence I receive in return. It's not like I'm always applying to jobs I'm not qualified for either. Sure I've stretched the truth about my qualifications for a few positions from time to time, but I have also sent in applications to places such as Walmart and Lowes. I have a bachelor's degree and even Walmart doesn't want me. Maybe they feel I'm over qualified. That idea enrages me to no end. Any place of business should seek to employ the best possible person, right? Yet I still sometimes feel the need to hide my accomplishments so that maybe someone out there will take a second from their day to give my application a second look. It doesn't matter though. Nothing I have hidden or added in has made anyone the least bit more interested in my resume. It is easy for someone to sit back and tell me to just take the first thing that comes along, but nothing has come along for me. Each day another layer of depression and frustration lays itself upon my shoulders. Every new rejection sends me deeper into the dark pit of existence I inhabit.

I have seen the faint glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel, however. I have been writing. Along with this blog I have begun writing short stories and even a novel. I am a writer. I have been told by more than one source that if you are serious about being a writer then that is what you need to call yourself. Maybe I haven't been published yet, maybe I can't make a living out of it YET, but to say I "want" to be a writer leaves cracks in my resolve and allows doubt from myself and others to seep in. I know there are people out there who will be adamantly opposed to my decision to write. Nothing I can say or do will sway their views, but I must continue regardless. I have spent the past 25 years of my life doing exactly what I thought everyone else wanted me to do. I went to college, knowing full well that it wasn't for me, because my whole life I had had this image drilled into my head of how a successful person was supposed to act. If I didn't follow the instructions, stick to the guidelines, and follow the well beaten path, I was wrong.

Don't misunderstand me, I am not blaming anyone. I had a better upbringing than anyone could ever ask for. I was guided with love and care. If given the chance to change any part of my life, I don't even know that I would. The paths I took to reach this point have made me who I am. Perhaps at times I should have found the strength to say no and listen to the desperate cries inside myself to be a different person, but that doesn't matter now. The past can't be altered.

I am a writer. Writing makes me happy. At the end of the day I have tangible evidence as to my accomplishments. I can produce something I feel proud of. I have undying support from some; I beg it from others. Whether I receive this support or not I am still taking this road. My pen is mighty, and with it I leave behind the shackles of what I'm expected to be.

Let's Go To The Fair!

Every year my mom and uncle attend the West Virginia State Fair. I have been able to accompany them almost every year. There were a few times when I couldn't make it home, but if I'm in town or close by at all, I try hard to go. Yesterday I was lucky enough to get to come along.

Part of the fun of the trip is the ride itself. My uncle knows all the back roads so Mom and I load into his truck and he drives us. The travel time is about two hours, so we make a couple stops. There is a gas station that we hit up every year. We pick up cakes and drinks for the road and continue on our way. In addition, we are entertained by my uncle's stories. He has an unlimited supply of tales about everything from areas or landmarks we pass to adventures from his childhood. The opportunity to be with those members of my family and hear my uncle's stories makes the ride fly by.

Upon arriving at the fair, our first stop is usually the exhibit buildings. Depending on what day of the week we go we can expect to see vegetables, flowers, or baking entries on display. We can always count on seeing art, photography, and crafts. It's fun to look at everything people have entered and see if we agree on the judges' choices.

After we finish exploring the exhibits it is usually about time for lunch, so we make our way back to the truck and eat the food we've packed. This may seem weird, but I love this about the trip as well. It's fun to have a picnic of sorts and watch the people heading into the fair. Believe me, people watching at a fair is never boring. All kinds of characters pop out of the woodwork for a state fair.

After lunch it's time to hit the livestock barns. The animals on display tend to vary a little as well, depending on what day we attend. Each year we can expect to see some combination of sheep, cattle, pigs, and goats. It's interesting to see all the different breeds of animals that are brought in. This year I especially enjoyed seeing some sheep with hair instead of wool that don't need to be sheared. Next stop is the draft horses. If you have never seen a draft horse up close you are missing out. No photograph can truly capture how big these animals truly are. The livestock exhibits are definitely one of my favorite parts of the fair.

At this point my uncle usually leaves us to go check out the farm machinery exhibits. Mom and I head to the rabbit barn. Inside is every breed of rabbit imaginable. They have tiny rabbits that could fit in your hand and massive rabbits that could eat your house cat, rabbits with super short velvet fur and rabbits that look like mops. The rabbit barn is full of children informing their parents how much they need a pet rabbit and that the one they are looking at says it is for sale. It can get a bit hectic inside, but the rabbit house is a great stop anyway.

We usually meet back up with my uncle somewhere around the poultry house. This building, obviously, contains all sorts of birds. They have baby ducks, chickens, and turkeys hatching in incubators. A slide surrounded by a pool always draws a crowd as people watch ducklings climb the slide and ride it back into the water. Finally there are usually pens containing full grown turkeys and non-traditional breeds of chickens.

At some point during the afternoon we always have to get homemade milkshakes. These are definitely some of the best milkshakes around. Unfortunately, this year my stomach was bothering me and I didn't feel up to having one of these amazing shakes.

After a full day of seeing all the fair has to offer it is time to head home. My uncles entertains with more stories for the ride. My stomachache bothered me this year, but I had fun nonetheless. It is always a little sad to leave the fair after having such a good day, but there is always the next year to look forward to. I hope that I will be able to attend!